Thursday, February 4, 2010

My Own Life Story

I wish I never changed.. My childhood has always been better than what I am right now.. Because right now, the more you say something, the more you commit a mistake and will create a big scar on what was seemed to be a beautiful and contented life you have.. When I was a little boy, I always thought that I have the most perfect life anyone could ever want.. We're not that rich as other people but I can have anything I want, eat whatever food I like, do whatever I thought of doing.. It seemed perfect for me until an unfortunate event took its place and made my life miserable.. Well, not as miserable as homeless kids are experiencing.. I'm still lucky in a way.. I have a share of mistakes that i don't want to remember because it just tears me up inside.. Right now, i just want to have the thing that is so called life because i think i lost it somewhere..
My life hasn't been the same as before.. Many changes have been made and I don't know if it's a good thing or not.. It's true that sometimes, you must have to sacrifice things that are really important to you to gain something that will make a difference.. I have lived a life full of regrets that sometimes I just feel that I want to return to the past and change the things that could have made an important part in my life right now.. But I guess that's how life plays its part.. It will give you a chance to pick from two choices that will lead to two different results.. It will either make or break your personality, spirit and wholeness.. The choice will always be final.. And in this life, one rule can stand as a philosophy of everyone.. "no one can help yourself but you.. so live your life the way you want it.. make choices and never look back.. Life is full of surprises that no one can experience but you..
Right now, I'm in a situation where a boy should be a man and stand on his own just to face this unfair world.. I have to gather all the strength that I have inside me just to pull out of a mess casted upon me.. A curse that I cannot fight but I must.. I am just lucky to have my wife called the "angel" who is pushing my back, patting my shoulder, giving advices, gives a helping hand when I'm in need.. It has made me push through life when everything around me is like a stagnant water in a swamp.. I'm thankful for having such a wonderful gift in my life.. Life has given me a lifetime friendship that I can treasure till my last breath..